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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29382099">write your dreams in ink</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/bambinaa/pseuds/bambinaa'>bambinaa</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Haikyuu!!</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - College/University, Anxiety, Fluff, I'll update tags as I go along!, M/M</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-02-12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-04-01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 07:09:07</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>11,415</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29382099</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/bambinaa/pseuds/bambinaa</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Asahi runs the struggling literary magazine of Karasuno University. Enter Noya, a kind and exuberant photographer who wants to help the publication. He also happens to be very, very cute. And totally would not like Asahi back. Right?</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Azumane Asahi/Nishinoya Yuu</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>32</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>Asanoya (main pairing)</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>As he sat in silence in an empty library, Asahi reflected on how much he hated himself sometimes. His head </span>
  <em>
    <span>pounded</span>
  </em>
  <span> as he massaged his temples to no avail. His weary body longed for the comfort of his soft bed, while his mind practically screamed for the retreat of his dorm room. His stomach was performing somersaults, threatening the tiny amount he had forced down during lunch. Racking his brain for the reason behind his mind and body’s sudden betrayal, he drew a blank; it seemed that he simply had awoken on the wrong side of the bed that morning. His prior classes had been fruitless, for he had been too concerned with his own anxiety to pay attention. Now, he was hiding in one of the smaller libraries on campus, a place rarely frequented by others, hoping that some quiet and privacy would calm him down. This state of anxiety was nothing new to Asahi, although that did not make it any easier to cope with. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was a state that was not made any better by the sudden burst of lightning in the room. Said burst of lightning appeared in the form of a boy whom Asahi had seen around campus before; short, with an endearing streak of blonde in his messy hair, he was energy and friendliness personified. He was also, Asahi noted, rather cute, with his oversized hoodie and permanent smile. Of course, this was a harmless observation when Asahi simply spotted him as the two made their way to classes; it made his anxiety spike to unparalleled heights when it seemed that that boy was </span>
  <em>
    <span>approaching </span>
  </em>
  <span>him. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>No,</span>
  </em>
  <span> Asahi insisted to himself, </span>
  <em>
    <span>why would he approach you? This library is here for the use of all students. Don’t be foolish and make everything about yourself. He’s probably here to meet someone else. Or maybe he’s–</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“Are you Azumane-san?” The voice of the boy, youthful and kind, suddenly interrupted Asahi’s thoughts. If he were in a better mood, it probably would have delighted Asahi to hear. In his current state of mind, it made his heart sink with fear. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“P-Please, call me Asahi,” he stuttered out. Great. He was scared to speak further, knowing he would only embarrass himself with anything he said, yet he didn’t want someone new to think he was incapable of conversation. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Asahi-san, then! My name’s Nishinoya Yuu, but you can call me Noya. Everyone does!” In spite of Asahi’s blunder, Noya retained his cheerful attitude.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Noya,” Asahi repeated, then paused. “Um, how can I help you?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Noya looked almost bashful as he ran a hand through his hair. “Well, um, I know one of your friends. Sawamura Daichi? He was the one who told me where I might find you. Basically, I’ve gotten pretty interested in photography. It’s just a hobby, nothing serious, and I wouldn’t say I’m good or anything like that. But Daichi said I should talk to you about it? Something about a magazine?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Whatever Asahi had expected Noya to ask him, it certainly was not that. “Oh! Um, yeah. I technically run our school’s literary magazine. We don’t have a lot of submissions, so that’s probably why Daichi told you…” He quietly reminded himself to both thank Daichi for caring about his interests and to kill him for making him talk to someone new.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You put photographs in a literary magazine?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, yeah,” Asahi chuckled softly. “We used to do just writing, but we literally had, like, four submissions a magazine. From the same four people. So we decided to expand to include art and photography, thinking that the creative types should stick together. We’re still struggling, though.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, I guess Karasuno is more of an athletic crowd? But that's no excuse to ignore everything else! So, Asahi-san, I think it's </span>
  <em>
    <span>so sick</span>
  </em>
  <span> what you’re doing! You’re like a knight defending the arts! So cool!” Noya exuded cheer and authenticity in every word he said, yet he suddenly regained that hint of sheepishness that Asahi had detected before. “Not that my photography is good or anything. It’s probably awful compared to the rest of the stuff you guys publish.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Asahi was left so surprised by this response that he momentarily forgot all his fear. Had Noya just… called him a knight? Was Asahi hallucinating this entire conversation? And how could someone so obviously spectacular as Noya put himself down like that?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Could I see one?” he asked. “One of your photographs, I mean.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Really?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Asahi had believed Noya to be bright before, but he was now positively exuberant. A smile stretched across his entire face, his eyebrows lifted, head held high. Asahi couldn’t help but notice: Noya really was very, very attractive. Attractive, and inching oh so close to him. </span>
  <em>
    <span>To show you his phone</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Asahi reminded himself. </span>
  <em>
    <span>It means nothing</span>
  </em>
  <span>.  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Noya moved his phone into Asahi’s view, on the screen of which was undoubtedly one of the most mesmerizing photographs Asahi had ever seen. A crow, wings outstretched, was lifting off into flight. Behind it, a pink sunset meshed with the dirty brown ground, a background that accentuated the deep black of the bird’s feathers. Asahi could only imagine the patience and skill that had gone into such a shot, to capture the bird at just the right moment with such a fitting background. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Noya, this is– I mean, this is really something!” he said, his eyes still glued to the phone. “You shouldn’t put yourself down at all. I don’t even know what to say! Just, wow!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Noya quickly pulled his phone away, startling Asahi. “Thanks, Asahi-san, but you really don’t have to be so nice, you know?” His face became slightly red as he began to inch back.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m not just being nice! Really, Noya, your piece is very, very good. It would fit perfectly in our magazine. Really.” </span>
  <em>
    <span>I think you would fit perfectly too</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Asahi silently thought to himself, but he kept his mouth firmly shut. There was no way someone like Noya, popular and confident, would want to waste his time in Asahi’s struggling little niche. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, alright! Cool! Can I just, like, text it to you then?” Asahi’s heart sank as his suspicions were confirmed. Noya had no interest in Asahi or his club. </span>
  <em>
    <span>And there was no reason to think he should</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Asahi reminded himself.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh, um, yeah. That’s fine,” Asahi said, trying to hide the dejection in his voice. He quickly typed his number into Noya’s phone and tried not to stare as the boy walked away.  A sudden remembrance made him call out. “Noya!” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Noya spun back, his face puzzled. “Yeah?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well…” Asahi began, mournfully. “As of now, we don’t have enough submissions to make an actual magazine. Printing is expensive, so we have to make sure it's large enough to be worth it, you know? So, uh, yeah. Just wanted you to know that, in case your photograph doesn’t end up anywhere.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Noya had begun to approach Asahi again. “Asahi-san, you seem upset. You must really like this magazine, huh?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I guess,” Asahi muttered, not wanting Noya to think him any more lame. He hadn’t meant to reveal his true emotions to Noya, but they couldn’t help but seep in – he really did care about his publication. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Noya paused, his face pensive. Suddenly, his face lit up, a bolt of lightning once again. The way Noya shone, Asahi was surprised he wasn’t blinded. “Asahi-san! Can I help?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“H-help?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Help with the magazine! Find other people who could contribute, or stuff like that!” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Asahi was stunned. “Would you actually want to do that?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Hell yeah! What you’re doing is amazing! Plus, I’d like to get to know you better, Asahi-san.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>His whole life, people had hid from Asahi, choosing to instead gossip about him behind his back. Some would fabricate stories about his criminal history and gang affiliations, simply because he was larger and had long hair. Others would laugh about his shy disposition, mocking the way he spoke and carried himself. However, Asahi was beginning to learn that Nishinoya Yuu was not like most people. He was something special, a vibrant stroke amidst the grey of the world. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And for some unknown reason, he wanted to be with Asahi. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The very thought made Asahi’s head spin, with both his usual anxiety and a newfound excitement. He was unsure exactly why, but he knew he wanted to be with Noya as well. He justified it to himself by saying that anyone would want to be near Noya; he was just that joyous of a person. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Don’t get too excited</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Asahi reminded himself. </span>
  <em>
    <span>He’s probably just being friendly.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“Um… Asahi-san?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Asahi had been so stuck in his own thoughts that he’d forgotten to respond to Noya. Typical. Trying to ignore the crushing embarrassment he now felt, Asahi swallowed and responded. “Don’t feel obligated to. But if you really want to, then I would be truly grateful.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Noya’s smile widened as he put his hand on Asahi’s shoulder. Asahi, already blushing from his previous embarrassment, reddened like the tomatoes his mother grew. He silently prayed that Noya wouldn’t notice. Apparently, this worked; Noya’s expression did not falter as he spoke. “I do want to! You can count on me!” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>That was a surprise, yet assuredly a welcome one. Some of Asahi’s embarrassment quelled, returning to his previous excitement. “Then, uh, would you meet me sometime tomorrow so I can show you what we have so far?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Sure! I have class in the morning, so how does meeting around four sound?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That works for me. Our room is room 212, in the literature department. Do you need help finding it?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Nah. I’m pretty sure I have a class somewhere near there. Speaking of, I gotta go right now or I’ll be late to my next class. But I’ll see you tomorrow, Asahi-san!” With that, Noya ran off, leaving Asahi to process what had just occurred.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Asahi was to meet Noya, who was attractive, friendly, and talented – everything Asahi thought he wasn’t. The very idea made his stomach drop, which sparked another realization. Even though the conversation had scared Asahi, he had temporarily forgotten about the severity of his previous state of anxiety while speaking to Noya. That was certainly… interesting. Resolved to indulge in this sense of accomplishment, Asahi quickly gathered his belongings, deciding not to think about Noya until tomorrow. Easier said than done, of course, for there was something about Noya that Asahi couldn’t quite shake. </span>
  <em>
    <span>He wants to be with you</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Asahi reminded himself, and let that thought run on repeat as he made his way back to his dorm room.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Asahi had seemingly awoken on the wrong side of the bed that morning, yet his day had not panned out nearly as poorly as he had expected it to. What had begun as a day filled with constant reminders of his own shortcomings was soon transformed by the arrival of one Nishinoya Yuu. He could only wait and wonder as to what this would mean in the days to come. </span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>thank you for reading &lt;3 this idea came to me as i was doing work for my school's own struggling literary magazine and i felt compelled to just grind this out – i truly hope you liked it!. i have the rest of the story planned out, so now it's just a matter of actually writing it lol.</p><p>kudos/comments are much appreciated (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧ you will literally make my entire life, plus it'll motivate me to write haha. i'd also love to hear your thoughts/questions/feedback on the story!! &lt;3</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The next morning, Asahi awoke to a familiar pit in his stomach. However, the excitement that had begun to bloom the previous day also remained. It was a fascinating combination, one that motivated him to get out of bed and practice some form of productivity but also kept Noya in his brain at all times. Hardly an appropriate thing for a classmate he had just met yesterday, but he found he didn’t hate it.</p><p>For the first time in ages, Asahi felt conflicted over what to wear that day. He usually stuck to nondescript clothing, afraid of standing out even more than he probably already did, yet he suddenly began to question this. Noya did not seem like the type to willingly blend into a crowd. Would he judge Asahi for doing so? Conflicted, Asahi opted for regular black jeans with an orange sweatshirt; the pop of color would hopefully add some liveliness while remaining in his comfort zone. Putting so much thought into something as simple as getting dressed should have poised Asahi to view the rest of the day with apprehension, yet the thrill of meeting Noya later that day made Asahi persevere forwards, fearless – or at least as fearless as he could get.</p><p>Asahi had two of his most difficult classes that morning, a fact for which he was grateful. By forcing himself to focus, he was able to prevent his mind from wandering into what was likely dangerous territory. It allowed for the day to pass rather quickly, and before he knew it, Asahi was heading to his club’s room, half an hour before the time he had agreed to meet Noya. The pit in his stomach had tightened, but he repeated yesterday’s mantra to himself: <em>he wants to meet you</em>.</p><p>To his surprise, Noya was already there, leaning next to the door. He spotted Asahi, his face brightening as he waved.</p><p>“I’m so sorry. Am I late?” Asahi quickly began, his brain automatically veering towards the worst.</p><p>Sensing his panic, Noya just laughed. “Don’t worry, Asahi-san! My last professor let us out early, so I headed here. I’m super excited!”</p><p>“Oh, um,” Asahi felt foolish for jumping to conclusions, but Noya’s positivity helped protect his mood. “Well, let’s go in, and then I’ll show you some stuff.”</p><p>The room was hardly larger than a closet, with an excess of desks and chairs strewn about. A dirty chalkboard, ancient, covered a wall, while the other side was littered with posters and fliers from days long gone. The blinds were down on the darkened room, although the collection of dust on the windows assured that no sunlight would ever seep through even if the blinds were to be lifted. The room was used for storage, only cleaned for emergency usage, with the exception of one publication that was tiny enough for no one to care if their conditions were less than ideal.</p><p>“I know it's not the nicest, but it's what we have,” Asahi said as he flipped a light switch. The bulbs were dim, doing little to alleviate the room’s depressing atmosphere.</p><p>The upbeat expression on Noya’s face remained despite that. Asahi didn’t understand how someone could be so positive all the time – the only time he had seen Noya look anything less than joyous was when speaking about his own photographs. “Don’t bring it down! It’s cool enough that you guys have your own room! Can I see some of your past magazines?”</p><p>Asahi dug through a closet in the back corner of the room to find a stack of magazines, buried underneath piles of unused notebooks and printer paper. He handed the stack to Noya, who began to peruse through them. “Wow! These are great! But I wanna see something you’ve done, Asahi-san. You write, right?”</p><p>Asahi rubbed at the back of his neck, his gaze downwards. “I guess. Nothing I write is very good.”</p><p>“You sound like me!”</p><p>“It’s not the same. My work is like, actually bad. Like, actually bad.”</p><p>“I don't believe that. But I wouldn’t know unless you actually showed me some.”</p><p>“I could not do that.”</p><p>“Why don’t you like your work, Asahi-san?”</p><p>Asahi reflected on the question. <em>Because I’m untalented</em> seemed like the obvious answer to him, yet he knew Noya would not accept such a vague response. Asahi tried to pinpoint what it was exactly about his writing that he disliked. “It’s unoriginal and unremarkable. I have a hard time expressing my feelings in writing, I think. So everything I write feels distorted, like it was written by someone else, and poorly at that.”</p><p>“Hm. I think you’re more talented than you give yourself credit for, Asahi-san. After all, you expressed yourself pretty well there,” Noya decided with his most serious expression.</p><p>Asahi felt a familiar sense of disappointment with himself despite Noya’s remarks. He was oversharing, he realized, and probably seemed like he was fishing for compliments. After all, despite Noya’s own low opinions on his work, he had still shown Asahi when asked. <em>He probably hates me, thinks I’m so weird, I–</em></p><p>“Of course, I’ll never be sure unless you actually show me! Pretty please?” Noya then attempted what were likely puppy eyes. Asahi was sure his heart would explode. Noya was really adorable like this, his shaggy hair and blonde streak only accentuating the puppy comparison.</p><p>On one hand, the idea of sharing his own despised work terrified Asahi beyond belief. However, the idea of disappointing Noya was unthinkable. Asahi was lucky enough that Noya entered his life – with uncharacteristic resolve, Asahi realized he wanted him to stay. “How about… if we can get this magazine published, I’ll be sure to contribute a piece. You can read that and see.”</p><p>Noya flashed him a large smile and two thumbs up. “Sounds like a deal!”</p><p>The two spent some more time in the room as Noya continued to read the magazines, occasionally asking Asahi a question or pointing out something he liked. Each time he heard Noya, Asahi felt his heart race. His anxiety had been bizarre these past two days, coming and going more frequently, yet not as unbearable as usual. He was sure Noya had something to do with this, for he had a strange effect on Asahi, one that was unfamiliar to him. Asahi felt positively about Noya, that was for sure, yet it was different from his feelings towards, say, Daichi or Suga. He couldn’t express exactly what it was. While Noya did calm him, in the way being near his friends did, he also filled him with a feeling of anticipation. Not uncomfortable, though, not like the way crowds or public speaking did. In a way that felt like the excitement of the night before a vacation or his mother announcing she was making his favorite meal, but with something extra added to those feelings. Weird.</p><p>Noya, finished looking through the magazines, looked up. “Are you going anywhere after this, Asahi-san?”</p><p>Asahi, who had had no particular plan in mind, decided that his usual haunt of his dorm room felt as good a place as any. “Probably just my dorm. I live on the west side of campus.”</p><p>“Same! Wanna walk together?”</p><p>“That sounds nice.”</p><p>The two headed out. The sun was already setting, a vibrant hue of pink that reminded Asashi of Noya’s photograph. He then made the grave mistake of pointing this out to Noya.</p><p>“You’re right! I love sunsets like this. Can I take your picture with it?”</p><p>“No. Absolutely not.”</p><p>“Pleaaaase? Your outfit is so cute and it’ll look even better with this background! Plus, I didn’t get to see any of your writing today, so this is only fair.” Again with the puppy eyes. Asahi had no choice but to relent.</p><p>“Okay, stand there and pose. Or, at least, smile. Smile larger! You look scared, Asahi-san! Do I scare you? Yep, that’s it! Great! Give me a second to try out some different angles now. Okay, great! Wanna see them?”</p><p>Asahi immediately dropped his smiles and sighed in relief. “Not really. Not that I don’t think your pictures are good! Just, um, yeah. I’m in them.”</p><p>Noya laughs. “Asahi-san! You need to have more confidence, you know. You’re very attractive.” Asahi did not understand why he did not drop dead at hearing this, for it definitely felt as if he should. All he could do was blush and shake his head profusely, which made Noya laugh even more boisterously.</p><p>Eventually, the two reached Asahi’s building. “I guess I’ll, uh, see you around, Noya. Let me know if you find anyone who’s interested in the magazine.”</p><p>“Wait! Can I have your number?”</p><p>“Oh! Of course.”</p><p>They exchanged numbers and then parted, Noya energetically waving goodbye as Asahi headed to his room. He put his phone on his desk, flustered by the events of the day yet determined not to let them dominate his mind, and opened his laptop to try and finish some assignments. After minutes of blankly staring at the screen, he picked up his phone to distract himself. The familiar racing of his heart returned when he saw a message on the screen.</p><p><strong>Noya</strong>: hiiiii asahi-san! i just wanted you to know how much fun i had today! thank you for showing me!!!!!!!!!! i hope we can see each other again soon ヽ(^◇^*)/</p><p>Deciding that self-control was no longer feasible, Asahi picked up his pillow, shoved his face into it, and promptly began to scream.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>this chapter was super fun to write for me mostly bcs i'm just projecting onto asahi LOL so i hope you enjoy it! i'd love to hear what you think uwu</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>“I heard you’ve been talking to Noya recently,” Daichi commented one afternoon. Asahi had met with him and Suga for lunch at a cafe on campus, a common occurrence for the three friends. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Um, yeah. Who told you that?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“He did.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh.” In the week since Asahi had taken Noya to see the magazines, the two had texted frequently. Asahi would usually talk about how his classes went or other mundane information, whereas Noya was all over the place – it seemed as if he wanted to know </span>
  <em>
    <span>everything</span>
  </em>
  <span> about Asahi. While usually reluctant to speak about himself, Asahi found he could be open with Noya, likely because the smaller man was so nonjudgmental and had no qualms about sharing anything. In fact, Asahi had discovered an absurd amount about Noya: he had three older sisters, played volleyball in high school, and was studying to become a physical therapist. He also hated grape juice, got suspended four different times, and wanted to travel the world when he was older. Asahi was clueless as to how the conversation had veered towards these topics. Noya just seemed to bring something out in Asahi, something that made him an excellent conversationalist.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Asahi, is there something you’re not telling us?” Suga inquired, teasingly.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What? No!” Asahi’s face grew hot. “We just text. He’s nice.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Nice? That’s it?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Fun, maybe?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Asahi, I know you. If someone was just </span>
  <em>
    <span>nice</span>
  </em>
  <span> and </span>
  <em>
    <span>fun</span>
  </em>
  <span>, you wouldn’t go through the trouble of dealing with your anxiety to speak with them,” Suga declared. Daichi nodded in agreement. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>That was fair. Asahi couldn’t remember the last time he had willingly made a friend. People tended to either judge or mock him, and even if they didn’t, he rarely had the courage to put himself out there. Even after years of his friendship with Daichi and Suga, he still sometimes wondered why they tolerated him. He wanted things to change when he reached college but he remained isolated, devoting all his time to pointless classes and a dying club, alone. Noya was special. From the beginning, he had expressed an interest in Asahi. Never once had he pointed out how Asahi was different, nor had he ridiculed him for his shyness, at least not with any malice behind it. Asahi found himself wanting to be with Noya, even if that meant travelling beyond his normal boundaries.  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Daichi and Suga continued to stare at him, clearly expecting a response. “He’s… different. I feel more comfortable around him. I look forward to us talking, I guess. Somehow, he makes my heart race and I don’t mind? I don’t know. I’m not sure how to describe this at all…” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>To his surprise, Daichi began to laugh while Suga just shook his head, a small smile on his lips. “Finally!” Daichi exclaimed.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Asahi, dear,” Suga said, a chuckle escaping. “I think you have what’s called a </span>
  <em>
    <span>crush</span>
  </em>
  <span>.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Logically, Asahi knew this made sense, no matter how mortifying it may be. You didn’t normally think about how attractive your friends were, nor did they make you scream into your pillows whenever they texted you. Of course, Asahi could have just chalked this up to his general nervousness around people. He wasn’t that clueless, however. Deep down, he knew there was validity behind Suga’s point. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The problem was that Asahi wasn’t sure if he’d ever </span>
  <em>
    <span>liked </span>
  </em>
  <span>someone before. He’d found people attractive, certainly, and he’d also realized that most of these people were men. Yet those were nothing more passing fancies or random observations; he’d never gotten close enough to anyone to actually develop romantic feelings for them. So how would he know if he actually </span>
  <em>
    <span>liked</span>
  </em>
  <span> Noya? </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Look! He’s not even denying it!” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No! I’m just thinking.” He began to pick at the sandwich in front of him, his eyes glued to the tiles on the floor. His whole body was uncomfortably warm, every instinct screaming at him to squash his friends’ suspicions. Still, if he kept this to himself, he knew he’d never figure it out. And who better to help than his two most trusted companions? “Maybe… maybe. I’m not sure. It’s not like it even matters though. He wouldn’t like me back.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Daichi placed his hand over Asahi’s. “I wouldn’t be so sure about that. Every time I’ve seen Noya since you two met, it’s been </span>
  <em>
    <span>Asahi-san, this</span>
  </em>
  <span> and </span>
  <em>
    <span>Asahi-san, that</span>
  </em>
  <span>. You know how much of a chatterbox he can be. The amount I’ve had to hear this past week about how much he admires you is truly unbelievable.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You can’t be serious.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I wouldn’t lie to you.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah, but–”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Stop it, Asahi!” Suga chimed in. “You’re always putting yourself down, but how the hell are you gonna know if Noya likes you if you don’t even give it a chance? If you like him, and you clearly do, just go for it. Whatever happens, we’re here for you!” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Asahi glanced up at Daichi and Suga, his heart filled with thankfulness. He’d been blessed with amazing friends. Both looked so supportive, their eyes glistening. Tease him as they may, he knew they would be there for him in times like this when he needed him. “Thank you guys. I’ll, uh, well, I’ll make no promises. But I’m gonna keep getting to know him, at least.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“That’s all you need,” Daichi reaffirmed with a smile and a tight squeeze of his hand. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The rest of their lunch passed enjoyably, Asahi still reeling from his realization yet distracted by the antics of his friends. After finishing their food, the three headed out of the cafe, planning to walk to their next classes together. A sudden realization hit Asahi. “Daichi, why did you say finally?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh, um,” he laughed sheepishly. “Well, Suga and I have been talking about when you’d finally like someone.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Guys!” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Come on!” Suga exclaimed. “This really is your first time, right? We’re your friends! Of course we worry about things like this. Which is why we’ll do everything in our power to help you and Noya.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“That sounds scary. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Swear</span>
  </em>
  <span> you won’t meddle. Please?” To this, Suga just winked. “Suga!” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Distracted by this, Asahi almost didn’t catch the “Asahi-san!” shouted from across the lawn. He turned to see none other than Noya, jumping and waving energetically, standing out despite his height. Speak of the devil. Asahi was </span>
  <em>
    <span>not </span>
  </em>
  <span>ready for this. He seriously considered sneaking away, acting as if he hadn’t seen Noya. His friends, of course, had other plans.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Noya!” Daichi greeted as he approached. “Not gonna say hi to me? I knew you first, you know.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Sorry, Daichi-san! Asahi-san just stands out more!” </span>
  <em>
    <span>Don’t remind me</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Sure. Whatever you say! I’m sure he’ll be happy to hear </span>
  <em>
    <span>you</span>
  </em>
  <span> say that,” Daichi said with a smirk. Despite Daichi’s kind appearance, he truly did enjoy torturing Asahi. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You must be Noya,” Suga interjected, apparently sensing Asahi’s discomfort. “I’m Sugawara Koushi. Call me Suga! After all, I feel like we already know each other. Asahi has spoken </span>
  <em>
    <span>so much</span>
  </em>
  <span> about you!” Nevermind. Suga was just as bad, if not worse. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Afraid of what other idiotic insinuations his friends would make, Asahi decided to steer the conversation to something safer. “What are you doing here, Noya?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I go to college here, Asahi-san!” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Um, I meant, like, at this cafe.” Perhaps Asahi had made a colossal mistake – it seemed he had invited yet another person to tease him, however lovingly. He could hear Daichi and Suga snickering behind him. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I knew that, don’t worry! I was just teasing. I’m actually planning to meet one of my friends for lunch, but I’m a bit early. He’ll be here in a minute.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Ah.” An awkward moment of silence passed between them. Awkward to Asahi, at least, and he had the bad habit of finding the most mundane moments awkward. Noya just looked at Asahi with fondness, his eyes gleaming.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Say, Asahi-san!” Noya suddenly exclaimed. “My friend is having a party tomorrow night. You should totally come with me! It’ll be a small thing, promise.”  </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Asahi should say no. Parties were large, crowded, filled with loud noises and small spaces and </span>
  <em>
    <span>so many people</span>
  </em>
  <span>. He would surely embarrass himself as always, making a mess of things when they had barely just begun. Had anyone else asked, he’d have known his answer before it escaped his lips.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>However, if there was one thing Asahi had discovered recently, it was that Noya was not anyone else. He was unique – Asahi’s initial comparison to a bolt of lightning had been oddly fitting – and affected Asahi in indescribable ways. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“That sounds fun. Text me the details?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Great!” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>With that, Asahi, Suga, and Daichi said their goodbyes, not wanting to be late to their classes. As they walked across the campus, cool breeze hitting their shoulders under the glaring sun, Asahi searched for the anxiety over his plans that inevitably would arrive. To his amazement, it was nowhere to be found. He couldn’t be fearful, not when Noya had so enthusiastically invited him. He knew it would come eventually – his brain had just been wired like that. Still, it was nice to revel in this feeling, this confidence and clarity in his desire to be with Noya. A welcome change.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>This change was apparent to his friends too, who had been staring at him, slack-jawed, the entire walk. “Who are you and what have you done with our Asahi?” Daichi questioned, not completely facetiously.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Suga, eyes comically wide, just whispered, “You’re </span>
  <em>
    <span>whipped</span>
  </em>
  <span>.”   </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Asahi couldn’t help but chuckle at his friends’ astonishment. He was still his regular, old self; Noya just happened to bring out the best in him. While he hadn’t known these feelings to be of a romantic nature, they’d always been there, ever since that fateful first day in the library. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Yet the question remained: did Noya feel the same?</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>don't know how i feel abt this one but yES here u go anyways</p>
<p>would love to hear ur thoughts &lt;3</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter 4</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Whatever confidence Asahi may have held beforehand had completely dissipated by the next afternoon. Forty minutes before Noya was to come to his dorm to pick him up, he was pacing the room, frantically trying to ready himself. Suga, who lay lounging on his bed, tried his best to comfort his panicked friend.</p>
<p>“Asahi, dear, I promise you’ll look amazing no matter what you wear.”</p>
<p>“You have to say that! You’re my friend!”</p>
<p>“Stop rejecting my compliments! I’m mean to my friends all the time.”</p>
<p>“Not true. You’re literally like a mother.”</p>
<p>“If I’m like a mother then listen to me! Wear the shirt I like, the one that fits well. Noya won’t be able to tear his eyes away.”</p>
<p>Asahi shook his head, disliking Suga’s suggestive tone. Still, he began to rake through his closet, looking for the shirt in question. He pulled it out, a short-sleeves black button up with green dragons snaking up. A gift from his sister, it certainly looked nice, but it was completely unlike him. The same Asahi who considered a plain sweatshirt to be adventurous could hardly wear this. He was sure his sister had gifted it in order to try and coax her brother out of his shell, but aside from a few times he’d hesitantly modeled it for Daichi and Suga, it remained untouched at the back of his closet.</p>
<p>“It’s so hot. You have to wear it.”</p>
<p>“Maybe I’ll just try it on… I guess there’s no harm in that. What pants should I wear?”</p>
<p>“You’re the one with the fashion sense, not me.” Asahi did have a hidden penchant for fashion, just not for himself. He’d assembled many outfits for his friends yet had convinced himself than anything other than jeans and the same sweater would look horrendous on him. However, he was about to experience what would likely be the most anxiety-inducing night of his life. Now was as good of a time as any to try something new, right?</p>
<p>Asahi changed into the shirt and a well-fitting pair of black jeans, accentuating the ensemble with a standard black belt. In anyone else’s eyes, it would be a rather normal outfit, but it was nerve-wracking for him. He swallowed, afraid to look at the mirror, instead eyeing Suga for approval, who’d bolted up, eyes wide.</p>
<p>“That bad?” Asahi chanced.</p>
<p>“Asahi, if you don’t wear that tonight, I swear on my life that I will kill you. I mean, I already think that Noya’s in love with you, but if he saw you in that? Holy shit. He’s gonna lose it. I’d probably date you if you weren’t already so smitten with someone else.”</p>
<p>Asahi opened his mouth to disagree until he remembered how Suga had chided him. He willed himself to accept the compliment. While he couldn’t bring himself to believe it, the least he could do was keep his mouth shut.</p>
<p>After tying his hair as per usual, he resumed his pacing, the anxiety staying firmly rooted. Suga, who had promised to stay until the last possible moment, snapped a picture of Asahi to send to Daichi. “Daichi says you look really hot.”</p>
<p>“Isn’t he supposed to be in class right now?”</p>
<p>“It’s calculus, or something stupid like that, so he doesn’t have to pay attention. But he says good luck! And to stop worrying so much or he’ll call just to yell at you.”</p>
<p>That was a terrifying prospect. Daichi was notoriously scary when angered. “I’m calm now. Well, uh, as calm as I’ll ever be.”</p>
<p>“I should go, then. Your crush does have a tendency to be early, doesn’t he?”</p>
<p>“Uh, yeah. Thanks, Suga. I really appreciate it.”</p>
<p>Suga got up and pulled Asahi into a tight hug. “I’m so proud of you, you know? You’ve got this. Noya’s got every reason in the world to be in love with you.”</p>
<p>“I–” Asahi paused, allowing himself to bask in the comfort of the embrace. “Thank you.”</p>
<p>Suga pulled away and flashed Asahi two thumbs ups. “Let me know how it goes!” After Asahi agreed, Suga departed, leaving the former alone with his thoughts. He checked his phone. There were still fifteen minutes til Noya was supposed to arrive.</p>
<p>A sudden fear set in Asahi’s mind that Noya would not be coming. That he had realized that Asahi was no fun, that his friends would dislike him, that there were a million other people who Noya could go with that were all somehow better than Asahi. It wasn’t an irrational fear. People were fickle and cruel; Asahi knew that better than most. He sincerely believed Noya to be exceptional, yet the doubt was ever present. That was just how his mind worked.</p>
<p>Despite all this, he was determined to make the best of this night. He’d eaten a light lunch, knowing his stomach would be upset due to nervousness. All throughout the day he’d visualized a million different scenarios in his mind, trying to predict any turn the party could take so that he would be prepared. And as inevitable as it was for his thoughts to descend down a dark path, he at least attempted to sustain some semblance of positivity.</p>
<p>These affirmations were repeating through his mind when he heard a knock followed by a familiar, joyous voice calling his name. Asahi turned to see Noya standing in his doorway. His mind froze, his mouth opening yet unable to utter any syllables. Noya looked <em>fantastic</em>. Asahi had usually seen him in casual clothing, sloganed sweatshirts and athletic pants, outfits which may have been low-effort but that Noya had looked amazing in nevertheless. Now, in a well-fitting sweater and skinny jeans, Asahi’s attraction only grew. The outfit highlighted his excellent physique, slender but muscular, and complimented the blonde streak that stayed down in his slicked-up hair.</p>
<p>Noya remained frozen as well, his eyes pinned to Asahi, who grew uncomfortable at the attention. “Um, Noya? Is everything alright?”</p>
<p>“Oh! Oh, yeah, don't worry!” Noya laughed. “I’ve just never seen you dress like that.”</p>
<p>“Sh-should I change?”</p>
<p>“What? No! It really suits you. You should dress like this more often.” Asahi blushed, unsure what to say. Noya gave a small smile. “Well, we should probably head out now!”</p>
<p>The two began their trek across campus. The party was being held at the house of a fraternity of which Noya’s friend was a member. The idea of a frat party terrified Asahi, but Noya had told him that it would remain a small occasion. Of course, Asahi should have recognized that he and Noya were bound to have different definitions of small.</p>
<p>The party was bustling, loud rap music blasting out of the tiny house. Throngs of people gathered all around the property, from the dirty lawn to the upstairs bedrooms, visible through the opened windows. Asahi stopped, trying to center himself. He’d never been to a party before, largely due to his aversion to crowds and the lack of friends to invite him. Yet he’d agreed to this one because it was with Noya, the shining beam of positivity that brought out the best in Asahi. As long as he remembered that, he could assure himself that this night would be conquerable.</p>
<p>“I see my friend! Come on, Asahi-san. I wanna introduce you two!” Noya grabbed Asahi’s hand and began to drag him across the lawn. Leaning against the porch was a tall, scowling boy, his head completely shaved. He nodded his head when he spotted Noya approaching.</p>
<p>“Yo.”</p>
<p>“Ryuu!” Noya exclaimed, giving the boy what was definitely the most aggressive high five Asahi had ever seen. “This is Asahi-san, the upperclassman I’ve been talking about. Asahi, this is my best friend, Tanaka Ryuunosuke.”</p>
<p>“Um, it’s nice to meet you.” Asahi attempted.</p>
<p>“Yeah.” Tanaka’s eyes darted around, looking everywhere but at Asahi. For this, he was grateful. He could only imagine how flustered he must appear.</p>
<p>Noya began to pull Asahi forward. “I’ll see you inside, Ryuu!” he called, looking back before turning again to Asahi. “Don’t mind him. He’s actually nice, just distracted right now because he’s looking for this upperclassman girl he’s in love with.”</p>
<p>The two continued into the house, Asahi not all there as he willed himself to stay calm. Noya, ever popular, was stopped by a crowd as soon as he entered. Letting go of Asahi’s hand, he began to introduce him to his other friends. Asahi tried earnestly to pay attention, not wanting to embarrass Noya in front of his friends, but he found himself failing. There were so many people, so many thoughts circulating in his head. Did he look alright? Should he say something? Had Noya finally discovered what a paranoid mess Asahi was? Despite his best efforts that night, his positive reminders and the presence of Noya, he was succumbing to the black hole of his anxiety. His mind was screaming, the constant chatter and blaring music doing little to help.</p>
<p>Suddenly, he felt the return of a warmth in his hand. He found himself being led again, not stopping until they reached the basement. It was large, the stairs leading into a room with a pool table that a group of students had gathered around. Noya continued forward into another room, smaller and empty save a tearing sofa and a treadmill in the corner.</p>
<p>“Are you alright, Asahi-san?”</p>
<p>Noya had noticed something was wrong. Had Asahi just looked scared, his usual deer-in-headlights expression plastered on his face? He didn’t remember speaking – had he failed to respond, then, to those who spoke to him? They were probably upstairs right now, snickering about what a freak Noya had brought to the party. Still, any fear of that couldn’t overcome the abject dread he felt at the idea of ruining Noya’s night. “Don't worry. I’m just not great with crowds, that’s all. We can go back up.” He tried and failed to keep his voice even.</p>
<p>There was worry in Noya’s eyes, noticeable despite his smile. “I wanna hang out with you tonight! If you’d rather it was just the two of us, I’ve got no problem with that”</p>
<p>“I don’t know…”</p>
<p>“If I wanted to spend all my time hearing Ryuu drone on about the goddess that is Kiyoko-san, I wouldn’t have invited you. But I wanna get to know you!”</p>
<p>Asahi sighed, both apprehension and relief coursing through his mind. Noya cocked an eyebrow up, as if asking Asahi what was wrong.</p>
<p>“It’s dumb. It’s like, I should be able to handle a party, you know? If this is fun for you, I want to do it too. And I had all this confidence, but now I don’t know where it went. I don’t understand why I can’t just act normal.”</p>
<p>It was only when Noya grabbed his other hand that Asahi realized they had never separated. Noya’s touch was grounding. His hands were callous – Asahi remembered he played volleyball in high school and decided that was likely related – but also fragile, small, fitting perfectly into Asahi’s.</p>
<p>“Asahi-san.” Noya began, his eyebrows endearingly furled in an attempt at seriousness. “Hasn’t anyone ever told you to stop putting yourself down?”</p>
<p>“Many times,” Asahi admitted sheepishly.</p>
<p>“Well then, start listening and stop it! You’re like the coolest guy I know. I’m aware I talk a lot, but you listen to me ramble about everything, which, like, no one else will! You’re sincere and passionate – I mean, look how much effort you put into your magazine! I don’t really know what I’m saying except that it’s okay to not be good at one thing. So what if you can’t do parties? There’s so much else about you.” Noya’s face had reddened. “Besides, I may like parties, but I think I like spending time with you much more. Whatever we’re doing. I don’t mind if it's just us.”</p>
<p>“I don’t–” Asahi began, then remembered what both Suga and Noya had told him today. He needed to stop putting himself down, stop rejecting compliments. “Are you sure?”</p>
<p>“Yeah! I doubt this party will be very fun anyways. Actually, I’ve gotten something else in mind. Something nicer than hiding in the corner of a basement.”</p>
<p>The two headed out, no one giving them a second glance. Asahi felt much calmer. He had forced himself to bury what Noya had said – he’d definitely stay up all night tearing it apart, but if he tried to think about it now he’d burst like a dam. There was only so much his poor nerves could take.</p>
<p>Noya, unusually quiet as they exited their campus, made no indication as to where they were going. Karasuno was located in a rural area and as far as Asahi knew there was little entertainment for a student outside of the university’s gates. The area surrounding it was rather beautiful, however, with acres rolling hills and an abundance of wildlife and greenery.</p>
<p>They began their way down a marked trail uphill. In the dark, it was difficult to decipher where one was going, the moonlight being filtered into tiny glimmers by the trees above. Asahi clutched Noya’s hand tightly to avoid getting lost. “Um, is it legal to be here right now?” he inquired.</p>
<p>“There’s no gate or anything. Besides, everything’s alright as long as we don’t get caught!” Although he couldn’t see him, Asahi was sure Noya was smiling mischievously.</p>
<p>Eventually they reached the top of the hill, at which point Noya let go of Asahi and continued forward. The moonlight, now allowed to bask them in its entirety, illuminated Noya, gracing him with an ethereal glow. He sat at the edge of the hill, peering downwards. As Asahi lowered himself as well, he realized they could see their whole campus from this height, all of the bright lights and stone buildings.</p>
<p>“I have a lot of trouble with school, sometimes,” Noya began. “It’s really frustrating. I’ll study for hours, and yet I still can’t pass my exams. For a while, I felt like there was just something wrong with me, something in my brain blocking me from learning. I thought about dropping out a lot. During those times, I’d come up here and look at the campus. It sort of, I don’t know, grounded me, I guess. Like a reminder that I was small, meaning my problems were small too, and therefore, conquerable.”</p>
<p>Asahi didn’t know what to say. Noya had always seemed so confident, so composed. A racing bullet, knowing exactly what he was doing and not letting anyone get in his way. The knowledge that Noya doubted himself just like he did made something ache in his chest.</p>
<p>Noya lifted his head, craning it upwards. “When that wasn’t enough, I’d look up to the sky. It’s really pretty here, isn’t it? When I first got into photography as a way to relieve my stress, I’d always try and take pictures of the sky up here.”</p>
<p>Asahi looked up. Without the blemish of civilization, the sky truly was beautiful. A dark hue of blackish blue, with pocks of stars and faint white clouds, he could understand the appeal. So expansive, so clear. Open and grand yet personal and comforting.</p>
<p>Asahi turned to face Noya, who remained looking up. “Thank you for sharing that. Thank you for everything, Noya. I– You’re really special to me.” He left it at that, hoping Noya would understand the raw emotion behind it.</p>
<p>“I feel the same way about you, Asahi-san.” Satisfied with the genuine tone in Noya’s voice, Asahi turned his gaze to the sky again.</p>
<p>A sudden gust of wind hit the pair, making Asahi shiver. He rubbed his bare arms, wishing he’d brought a jacket with him. Suddenly, Noya reached over and wrapped his arms around. “For warmth,” he whispered. Asahi felt himself freeze, unsure what to do with the sudden closeness. Noya still was looking at the sky, but he tilted his head until it rested on Asahi's shoulder. Asahi felt strangely pleasant, melting in the warmth of the embrace, and allowed himself to relax. The two spent the rest of their night in this position, comfortably silent except for the occasional comment, the moon and stars their only witnesses.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>this is a long one – i was thinking abt splitting it up in two but i couldn't figure out where to separate so hopefully you just enjoy this big boy :) </p>
<p>oh also i made a twitter i'm @husbanowo ! i made it and then promptly forgot abt it which its so empty haha but i'll figure it out... one day... i can't rly talk abt my fandom stuff to my irl friends so please feel free to come scream at me there :D</p>
<p>thank you for reading this far this story is very nerve-wracking for me to post LOL so it means so much &lt;3</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Chapter 5</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>The pair had remained in that position until the orange sun had begun to peak out from behind the trees, reminding them that the world was still turning, their responsibilities still present. They had awkwardly pulled apart and then made their way towards campus, parting ways once reaching Asahi’s dorm. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Asahi found himself in an odd situation. He was truly beat from the night before, yet his mind would not allow him to sleep. Every thought led to Noya. The kindness he had showed, his warm embrace, his welcoming smiles. The pang in his heart Asahi had felt before was now amplified by a million. He’d thought so low of himself, only for Noya to reaffirm him in every way he needed, as if Noya had simply been born with an intrinsic mastery of the labyrinth that was Asahi’s mind. Noya, Noya, Noya. Asahi felt as if he was floating whenever he thought about the vulnerability and trust in Noya’s voice or the electrifying power of his touch. It seemed as if with every interaction he gained more and more to love about Noya. Love. Was that what this was? He had a crush, that was definite now, but were crushes supposed to be this potent, this overwhelming? And would Noya have shown the consideration and tenderness he had if he didn’t feel the same?</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>It dawned on Asahi that if he allowed his mind to continue, spinning in this infinite circle, he’d lose whatever semblance of sanity he currently held. He didn’t dislike dwelling on this, rather he knew his mind would find some way to warp in into something negative, a change from his current adoration. Instead, he tried video calling Daichi and Suga, hoping they would offer some advice. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Asahi! You look terrible!” Daichi exclaimed as soon as he entered the call.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He was probably right. Asahi hadn’t even attempted to comb his windswept hair. His face looked sallow, eyebags pronounced from a night of sleeplessness and two straight days of worrying. Still, he didn’t feel terrible, despite the neverending mess in his mind. Everything, even the scariest thoughts, were tinged with the warmth that radiated off of the brightest person he knew. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You could be nicer about it!” He chided Daichi. “But it’s only because I didn’t sleep last night. I feel pretty good.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Didn’t sleep last night? Anything I should know about? Hope we’re keeping everything school appropriate, dear.” Asahi hadn’t even noticed Suga entering the call. Of course he would chime in during the most embarrassing moment. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s nothing like that! We just sat together under the stars. It was nice.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Under the stars? Weren’t you supposed to be at a party?” Daichi inquired. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah, but I guess parties aren’t really my thing.” With that, Asahi recounted the events of the prior night.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Wow! He’s a real catch, huh?” Suga teased. “Sounds </span>
  <em>
    <span>romantic</span>
  </em>
  <span>.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It… might have been. But probably wasn’t? Ugh. I have no idea. What do I do?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You could ask him about it,” Daichi suggested, ever practical.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No way I could do that. But he’s all I can think about! I can’t talk to him right now, though. He has one class and then he’s gonna sleep all day.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Maybe you should do that too,” Suga said caringly. “You look </span>
  <em>
    <span>really</span>
  </em>
  <span> tired.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I know myself. I won’t be able to sleep while this is brewing in my mind. Any other day it’d be fine, but you’re right – I really need rest.” Asahi paused, trying to come up with some sort of solution. “I’d love to hang out with him again. It’s too soon to ask, right? He’s just all I can think about.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Both Suga and Daichi stayed silent, clearly thinking. Suddenly, Daichi’s face lit up. “You should make plans to do something for your magazine! That way, you wouldn’t have to worry about it being too soon, seeing as it’s important work.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Oh yes. The literary magazine. The whole reason Asahi and Noya met, their excuse to continue their friendship. Asahi’s one true pursuit in life. Which he had totally forgotten about this past week, absorbed with his own feelings. The magazine that was so far from completion, it may as well be nonexistent. “Ah. That’s a great idea, Daichi.” He rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. “Thanks for reminding me. I’ll, um, ask him about that tomorrow.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Sounds good. Now sleep!” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Sleep suddenly seemed very appealing. Asahi said his goodbyes, resolving to make plans with Noya for the magazine tomorrow, before crawling under the covers and promptly falling asleep. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span> *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Noya’s enthusiasm was palpable through the phone when Asahi called him the next morning to suggest they put up fliers around campus to garner submissions for the magazine. Despite both of their enthusiasm at the idea of new members, they had quickly realized that neither had exactly held anyone in mind. Therefore, they would simply have to scour the masses. The plan was for Noya to put together a flier which the two would print and spread after lunch. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>When Asahi reached the computer room of the library, he found Noya already there, staring intently at the screen. He seemed to have caught up on sleep – his face was as exuberant as ever, his hair perkily done up. There was not a trace of fatigue, unlike Asahi who still looked a bit like the ghost of a samurai. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Asahi-san!” Noya called, hearing the other’s footsteps. “Come look!”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Asahi peered forward at a design on Noya’s screen. It was a flier for the magazine, bright and interesting with big text reading “</span>
  <b>Karasuno Literary Magazine!</b>
  <span>” and little cut-outs at the bottom that had Asahi’s email written on them. It filled him with an odd sense of pride, the fact that </span>
  <em>
    <span>he</span>
  </em>
  <span> specifically was tied to the creation of this. He was much more in awe, however, of Noya’s creation.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“This is really good! How did you make it? I can barely even use Google Docs,” he said, eyes still glued to the flier. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s really no big deal. I like editing and all that kinda stuff. So, we ready to print?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Combining the number of free prints they had left under their tuition plans, they were able to print enough fliers to hit all the most viewed spots on campus. Asahi wasn’t sure as to the legality of just sticking up fliers without permission, yet he decided it was probably better to just not think about. The two began weaving their way through campus.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>They talked amicably of meaningless, mundane things. How they liked the dress of a girl they saw passing, or how Asahi refused to enter one building because he’d been avoiding a professor’s class and was terrified of being called out. Asahi knew that he should bring up the night of the party, but he wasn’t sure what to say. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Hey! Sorry for sorta kinda ruining your night. But you literally did the nicest thing ever and also I’m so caught up in your touch and also you looked amazing in the moonlight so basically I’m in love with you. Think this is a good place for our advertisement? </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Instead, he tried something easier. “Do you think people will actually send us submissions?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Sure!” Noya assured as he held out his hand. Asahi froze, staring at his outstretched palm. Those fingers which had guided him, like Charon through the Styx, so powerful yet delicate. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Um, Asahi-san? Some tape?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh!” Asahi shook his head, snapping himself out of his musings. He clumsily tore off a piece of tape and handed it to Noya.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Noya, by the way he began chattering again, seemed to have thought nothing of Asahi’s little blunder. “You don’t really like talking to new people, right? So that’s probably why nobody ever submits anything. You can’t expect people to just </span>
  <em>
    <span>know</span>
  </em>
  <span> things. After all, the list of clubs here is like a thousand pages long – nobody’s combing through that. You’ve gotta put yourself out there a bit, like we’re doing now!” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s so scary though! I think I’ll just leave that part to you.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Fine by me! I’ve always got your back, Asahi-san!’ With that, Noya put his hand on Asahi’s shoulder and smiled widely. Asahi’s heart skipped a beat as Noya’s thumb made contact with his bare skin. Surely accidental, he told himself. But Noya’s eyes, bright and crinkled, remained locked with Asahi’s. In that moment, Asahi became acutely aware of Noya’s lips. He wanted nothing more than to reach forward and caress them with his own, feeling he and Noya melt into one, regardless of the fact that they were in public for everyone to see.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>However, that fact still remained, so Asahi settled for pulling himself away. “W-we should go to the humanities building now,” he stammered out. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Something – disheartenment? – flashed across Noya’s face, but he quickly composed himself and agreed to Asahi’s suggestion. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Asahi wasn’t sure what he was thinking – yes, the humanities building would provide much more privacy, yet he doubted he would have the courage to actually act. There was always the possibility that no such opening would occur again, or that he had completely misread the situation altogether. Still, logically the humanities building was where one would find the type to work in a literary magazine, so at least his suggestion wasn’t completely brainless. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>They reached the building and headed inside. The main floor was somewhat busy, students sprawled across sofas, walking to and from class, posters for museum exhibitions and Shakespeare performances plastered across the walls. Noya quickly taped one of their fliers in a corner with a sitting area, leaving another laying on a coffee table before waving to a couple students and heading back to Asahi. “I know the higher levels of this building tend to be emptier, like where the club’s room is, so you think we should just head out?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Asahi mustered up all his courage. “Let’s head up anyways. If we’re gonna find someone, we’ll find them here, right?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>So the two made their way up the building, leaving a couple fliers on each floor they went to. Finally, they reached the highest floor. A couple classes were being held, stray papers and overhead lights reminding them of the fact that they weren’t truly alone, even if this floor was comparatively empty. After doing what they had come to do, Noya began to walk towards the staircase with the realization that they had run out of fliers. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Asahi’s mind froze. What had his whole plan been? To kiss Noya in this hallway? Well, he could backtrack a bit. Kissing Noya may be a bit much, but there was nothing wrong with talking about their feelings, was there? In fact, it was necessary. “Noya, wait!”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Noya spun around. “Yes, Asahi-san?” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Asahi searched his mind desperately for where to start. “Um, I think we should talk,” was all he could splutter out. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“About what?” Noya’s eyebrows were now creasing together. He was clearly confused. Asahi willed himself to respond.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Two nights ago. The party.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I really enjoyed it!” Noya paused, clearly reflecting. “Did… did you not? Because I’m sorry if I was too forward–”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“No!” Asahi rushed to exclaim, probably a bit too loudly. “I enjoyed it… very much. I– I really like you, Noya.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I really like you too, Asahi-san!”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Asahi was puzzled. How had Noya said that so nonchalantly? Had he not understood Asahi’s implications? “I meant… I meant that in a romantic way.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Noya put his hand to his chin. “Romantic? I’m not sure I understand.” Asahi’s eyes widened with fear. Oh no. He had truly made a mess of things. Before he could run away, Noya giggled and closed the gap between him and Asahi, placing his hands on Asahi’s shoulders and pushing up off his toes. Asahi hadn’t even registered what was happening when he found Noya’s lips meeting his. They were soft, his skin warm, smelling faintly of the ocean breeze. “Is this what you meant by romantic?” Noya whispered as he pulled away.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Asahi, shocked, muttered something incoherent even to himself. Noya just laughed louder and kissed him again. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>They could have been kissing for just a fraction of a second or for lifetimes; Asahi could hardly tell. His brain had seemed to exit his body, leaving a gaping hole in his head that could do nothing but repeat </span>
  <em>
    <span>Noya, Noya, Noya</span>
  </em>
  <span>! Noya, kissing him! He’d acted as if he didn’t understand – had he just been teasing? Probably, yet Asahi couldn’t find it in himself to be hurt. Noya’s embraces were sweet enough to alleviate the pain of any wound. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>They were interrupted by the sound of a door opening and shouts of goodbyes. A nearby class had likely ended. Noya pulled away, smiling. “Looks like we’re out of fliers, and I promised I’d help Ryuu with something. I’ll catch you later, yeah, Asahi-san?” He winked, then stepped out into the ocean of people that were flooding out of a doorway, leaving Asahi floating, unable to act. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He knew people were staring, wondering why a boy who they may have just seen making out was now frozen, interrupting the hallway’s traffic. He couldn’t find it in himself to care. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Eventually, he began to walk again, his destination unknown. He was so overwhelmingly </span>
  <em>
    <span>happy</span>
  </em>
  <span>. He couldn’t even begin to process what had happened. He just reveled in ecstasy. The sun seemed brighter, the birds chirpier, the grass greener, and everywhere he looked he caught flashes of blonde streaks and wide smiles. </span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>sorry this took longer! i've had a lot of school work, plus my driver's test is coming up so i've had to prepare for that. life should be normal sorta soon so i hope to get the next two(?) chapters out at my regular pace </p>
<p>i really hope you enjoyed this :) thank you for reading! &lt;3</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Chapter 6</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>The joy that clung to Asahi showed no signs of dissipating. He felt giddy whenever he remembered Noya’s devious smile or his tantalizing lips. Asahi drifted through his classes, unable to pay attention. How could he? English or economics hardly seemed needed – in fact, Asahi had begun to think that he needed nothing but Noya.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>His happiness only wavered whenever he remembered the unknown state their relationship was currently in. Despite their embrace, Noya and Asahi had yet to actually discuss what had happened. It had been established that they both held romantic feelings for each other but… was that it? Was that really all that had to be said? As much as Asahi had enjoyed that event, he couldn’t help but wonder. He had no past relationships to go on, and even though he knew Suga and Daichi would offer their help, he was determined to figure this out by himself.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It wasn’t as if the two hadn’t spoken since the kiss. Asahi was constantly updating Noya on the sheer number of interest emails he was receiving – it seemed that Noya was right in that all that was needed was a bit of publicity. But Asahi was once again too scared to broach the subject of their kiss and Noya seemed happily oblivious. He knew that they could not go too long without speaking about it. The longer they went, the more their chances of actually establishing something decreased. So he decided that once a sufficient number of submissions had been received, he would invite Noya to help him review them – there, in person, he would force himself to ask Noya what they were. Content with his solution, he returned to the bliss of remembering their kiss. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Surprisingly, that day came only four days after the original fliers had been posted. While not many people had been able to provide completed works – hardly a surprise due to the short amount of time – almost everyone had attached some sort of sample work to see if they’d fit. It was amazing, the well of deep talent at Karasuno that had lain untapped for so long simply because Asahi had been too scared to talk to anyone. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Asahi didn’t exactly </span>
  <em>
    <span>need</span>
  </em>
  <span> Noya to go through sample works with him – he believed anyone who was enthusiastic enough to contact him deserved to have a spot in the magazine – but he decided that he ought to reach out to Noya anyways, if only to go through with his original plan. That was how he found himself on his way to the club room that afternoon, laptop in hand. Although there remained a pit of anxiety in his stomach, he found it was smaller than usual. Every interaction, he grew bolder and bolder. He and Noya just seemed to click in a way that allowed Asahi to forget about his jagged edges. Besides, they had already kissed, already admitted their feelings towards one another, so what more did he have to fear?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He took a deep breath and pushed open the room’s door to see Noya sitting at one of the desks, early as per usual. Noya waved and called out his usual energetic greeting. “Asahi-san! See, I knew the fliers would work!” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah. Thank you for all your help, Noya.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>‘Of course! Anytime! So, should we start looking?”  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Asahi slipped next to Noya, opening his laptop. As they perused through emails, they had nothing but compliments for the work they saw. Noya’s eyes widened at every submission of  art or photography, pointing out all the positive traits and difficult techniques. While even Asahi could admire them, he couldn’t help but notice how none elicited the same emotions that Noya’s photography had – although perhaps that had something to do with the man behind the camera. When it came to the writing, Asahi couldn’t help but compare it to his own work, but he reminded himself to stay confident.  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>With every email, Asahi grew more and more impatient. What to say? </span>
  <em>
    <span>Hey, Noya, why’d you kiss me and run away? Are we boyfriends?</span>
  </em>
  <span> Well… when he put it like that it didn’t sound too awful, but he knew he couldn’t find it in himself to be that blunt. Noya, happily continuing through works, seemed oblivious to Asahi’s torment. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Um, Noya, can we talk?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Sure, Asahi-san! What’s up?” Noya’s eyes remained glued to the screen. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“About the day we put up the fliers…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah? What about it?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We kissed.” Asahi could think of no other way to phrase this. How was not Noya not understanding what Asahi was leading to? Did the kiss mean that little to him? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That we did! Is that alright? I was under the impression we both liked each other.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We do! At least, I like you. But shouldn’t we, you know, talk about it?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Noya turned to face Asahi. His large eyes were filled with earnesty and kindness. He took Asahi’s hands in his own. “I wanted to give you space and time. I know you’re new to this – Daichi told me, while also warning me that he’d literally murder me if I hurt you – and I didn’t want you to feel rushed into anything. That’s why I’ve been waiting for you to reach out first.”</span>
  <span>
    <br/>
  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“B-but you left so suddenly!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Noya grinned mischievously. “I may have been teasing you a bit. Although I did actually have to help Tanaka.” His face softened. “I never meant to cause you unnecessary worry. I just wanted to give you time to think. I mean, you could do so much better than me–”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What?!” Asahi was so dumbfounded by that statement that he ignored everything else Noya had said.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, it’s true! You’re everything I’m not: kind, intelligent, </span>
  <em>
    <span>tall</span>
  </em>
  <span>–”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Noya, please shut up for a second. I can’t even begin to explain how wrong you are. You’re everything you listed – well, maybe not tall, but I hardly think that matters! And while I wish you hadn’t just left me hanging, I’m glad I’m getting this opportunity to tell you my feelings, properly this time.” Asahi’s brain scrambled for the right words. “I’ve never met anyone who’s affected me the way you have. You’re electrifying! I know that sounds a bit dramatic, but I really mean it. I feel at home with you. I– I like you. I know we haven’t known each other for that long, but I really think we have something special. Would you– would you like to be my boyfriend?” Asahi swallowed nervously. It was clunky and awkward, he knew that, but all he needed was for Noya to understand. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Suddenly, he felt two small hands cupping his face followed by a quick peck on the lips. “That was perfect, Asahi-san,” Noya whispered. “I would love to.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The two continued to embrace, pausing only to admire the light in each other's eyes. It was only when Asahi’s phone buzzed with the notification of another email that they remembered their true purpose in meeting.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Don’t worry, Asahi-san. We’ll have plenty of time for that later,” Noya comforted with a wink. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Asahi was sure he had never been happier in his life. All the worry he had wallowed in up to this point felt foolish. How could he doubt Noya, who was so pure, so earnest, who only ever had the best intentions? And perhaps he shouldn’t have even doubted himself – for whatever flaws he held, Noya still accepted him with open arms. As absurd as the past couple of days had been, they had provided him with a much needed challenge. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They continued to pore through emails until Noya suddenly spoke.  “Um, Asahi-san? Can I ask you something?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Of course! What is it?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“When we start to assemble the magazine, could we promise not to look at each other’s work until it’s published?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Asahi reflected for a second. He hadn’t even thought about what he would write, although recent events would surely provide inspiration. “That sounds like a good idea.” Whatever he wrote, he knew he’d want to see Noya’s face while reading it. He had no clue as to why Noya would hide his work, however. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>It’s best not to dwell on things</span>
  </em>
  <span>, he reminded himself. Perhaps he was a chronic worrier – even so, he wouldn’t let anything permeate his happiness at the moment. He placed his head on his boyfriend’s shoulder and hummed contentedly.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Everything good, Asahi-san?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Everything’s perfect.”  </span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>i am so so sorry for not having this out sooner! i've been watching a lot of romance anime and it made me realize i am not very good at writing romance, to the point where i couldn't stand to look at my work for a bit. eventually i sucked it up tho bcs i needed to continue projecting on to characters &gt;:)</p><p>thANK YOU for reading!! &lt;33 ily guys more than you know stay safe mwah</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
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